Work with the available light

“I don’t think that one produces a great picture unless one destroys a good one in the process.”
Frank Auerbach, 2009

Frank Auerbach was in his nineties when he passed, early in November, 2024. As much as for his extraordinary portraits and landscapes, he is recognized for his singular work ethic – painting in his Camden Town studio every day, seven days a week, taking one day off each year to go to the coast for some sea air.

I suspect that “work ethic” isn’t the right word for it, because that makes it sound like grim discipline, self flagellation, something to be endured. I can’t help but think, based on my own recent experience, that he just loved it. Given the choice to paint or do anything else, he just wanted to paint.

Throughout most of my life there has been a strong correlation between how well I thought a given project was going and how worried I was that I would somehow fuck it up — how much I enjoyed the process being inversely correlated to this. But since the first painting I finished at the beginning of 2023, it has been a different world. I’ve struggled, been lost, had to detour and backtrack, but every time I’ve needed to reassess and adjust, I’ve arrived at something compelling, surprising, singular, fully realized. To the point where now, when a painting gets into trouble, I see it as a gift, because the result will be better in a way I can no longer anticipate and can’t wait to see.

Confidence will only take you so far, but curiosity is renewable and self sustaining.

48”x60”
acrylic on canvas
private collection (commission)